"I was once known as Josh. I am now Zed."
I spoke these words nearly 12 years ago as a college freshman. Little did I know how much a silly college tradition of bestowing a nickname on each new member of "Sigma Beta" (or the Second floor of Bergwall Hall) would come to deeply impact my life.
The name comes from some weird logic stemming from my favorite movie. Several upperclassmen beckoned me into the study room one pivotal September evening. Among many questions directed towards me was but one that determined my fate: "What is your favorite movie and why?"
"School of Rock," I answered. "And I really like Jack Black."
Jack Black also starred in Year One where his character's name is "Zed." The upperclassmen determined this would be my name.
You won't hear the name my parents gave me if you speak to any of my fellow Sigmabetans (Buzz, Hasbro, Thor...). Zed is who I am and always will be to them.
For me, the name has come to exemplify prominent aspects of my personality in several loosely symbolic ways:
1. Zed comes from many languages referring to the letter "Z" - the last letter in the alphabet. It represents the end, a boundary.
2. Many friends know me for my dependability. I was even given a cute little "superlative" award in grad school based on this reputation.
3. A friend once told me I represent "the edges of things" because of my tendency to not hide how I truly think or feel about any given topic or issue.
4. Another friend told me I'm like a lighthouse - always there, always present, always representing the edge or boundary, and always unchanging and pointing the way to safety.
I'm not sure if "Zed" is the perfect intersection of these qualities I've come to appreciate about myself thanks to the loving affirmation of others, but it's darn well close enough. It represents who I have become and who I am becoming.
So, while my legal and primary name (Josh) remains unchanged, my college nickname will remain forever significant to me.
Whatever your name is, may you learn to embrace all the given, learned, and yet-to-be-discovered parts of who you are.